Divorce is never easy. No one walks down the aisle with the idea that their marriage will end. But here you are, and you are wondering: Is it possible to make this a sane, respectful experience? After all, you've spent many years of your life with this person. You want to leave this union on as good terms as possible.
Solid and sustainable
Mediation is a viable option that can help you achieve a divorce that is solid and sustainable. What exactly does that mean? The core of mediation is the ability to determine, through a neutral third party, an agreement that you tailor together.
Why is this important? Generally, we are more likely to honor commitments that we have made rather than ones that have been determined for us. Mediation takes the contentiousness out of divorce.
Both of you have lawyers--and you should it is important that you have someone who is looking out for your interests above all else. That can, however, lead to a natural us vs. them mentality that can make negotiating difficult. The court system itself can exacerbate this. It is set up with motions, filings and hearings that one side has to bring against the other.
Calm and considerate
Mediators talk to people, with or without their attorneys present, and encourage them to meet in the middle. Many mediators are also lawyers. How does his help you? Having someone who is versed in the law and how it works, but who is also neutral, allows you to engage in conversations that are focused and balanced without the attendant emotion that can occur when parties face each other in court as adversaries.
In addition, mediation can save you money. Mediators can generally help negotiate an agreement that bypasses court almost altogether, thereby saving you filing fees. In addition, divorces that use mediators tend to resolve more quickly, saving you attorneys fees for correspondence, depositions and court dates.
In short, mediation allows you and your spouse to make the determinations about you and your family's future in a neutral, collaborative environment.